Gen3x

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Do you have what it takes to be the man?

Do you have what it takes?

 

Question:  How do you put the trust and harmony back into the family home and marriage after your lured lifestyle has come to light?

Answer:  YOU DON’T!  You couldn’t muster up the power/guts to stop viewing pornography in the first place, so what makes you think that you can put it all together again?

– Pornography will never replace your wife –

When you eventually find yourself in this situation and you will, either through confession or exposure, you will want to limit the damage and do what you think is best for everybody involved. This is where a steep learning curve comes into your life whether you like it or not. As we have learned already, submission to Jesus, confession to those whom we have hurt through pornography and repentance to God, are the first steps in a long healing process – and how long is the process? Well that depends on you, it depends on how much of you, you are willing to sacrifice and hand over to God. He can only deal with the issue’s that you are prepared to face up too.

Your marriage, your kids, your home, your business and everything associated with you is now at stake. The atmosphere and tension at home is heavy and thick so do you fold, cave in and take it to Jack Daniels or do you seek the Lord and let Him pull you out?

Pornography can never and will never replace any wife, no matter how good or bad you may think she is. So now’s the time to rip up your season ticket, sell your golf clubs, sink the rod, park the bike and just be there for her. Your marriage is you’re first and foremost concern, you can cry and whinge that Satan is attacking your marriage and causing conflict, but if you haven’t made it the first priority in your life then you have allowed the enemy to come in and cause conflict. A lot of church leaders will say there has to be a bit of compromise and you need your free time and space to unwind, well if we are to be to our wives as Jesus is to his bride the church, then we need to be there for her. Has Christ ever taken time out from His Bride to watch the match, go fishing or play golf?  Does Christ ever come to burden His Bride with His problems or concerns?  No! He goes straight to His Father. So likewise, there is no blame game here – you go straight to Jesus to sort out the mess that you’re in.

– be thankful through trials –

There’s no point in acting like nothing has happened.  Life will be a struggle for everybody involved since your secrets have been exposed. The fallout will affect everybody. Your wife will feel as if she is living in a nightmare, a shattered life with all hopes and plans robbed, feeling deceived, bitter, let down, robbed, betrayed. You will never know or understand the hurt and turmoil that you have plunged her into, so don’t be feeling too sorry for yourself, you were drawing your wisdom and knowledge from another source.  Now’s the time to throw yourself at the Lord’s feet and wait there until He prompts your next move.  The Holy Spirit was faithful, He will have given you enough warnings and promptings to your spirit in the past, but you refused to heed them. Be thankful that this has come into the light – this is a second chance that Christ is giving you to become a new man, the other option was spending an eternity in hell or losing your inheritance in heaven.

Now that the Lord has finally gotten your attention – the real work is ready to begin. He will be faithful to lead you daily through this very tough time, it was never Christ’s will that you end up where you are – that was your decision, but one thing’s for sure, Jesus will be relentless in His pursuit to get you out of this mess and heal your wife’s broken heart.  Men you need to be taking ownership of this situation and stand your ground. No amount of guilt can make you be mister nice guy forever. God has to be in the process. Now that the pornography has been exposed it’s time to cut it out of your life completely along with all your other distractions, everything that would hinder your recovery (check out the Quitters check list).

– be the man –

Men, are you the spiritual covering for your family?  Well are you going to stand by and let pornography slap your children around as it has slapped you around? Our sons need to have their sexuality confirmed by their dads. Listen, if he doesn’t hear these words “I love you son” from his dad he may spend the rest of his life trying to prove his manhood by living recklessly, drinking heavily, driving manly vehicles, looking macho – all pumped up, living dangerously with extreme sports or sleeping with as many women as possible to assert his manhood and identity.  This is where pornography and masturbation plays its part, because it keeps him locked into an unreality world that keeps his mistaken idea of manhood alive.

Our daughters also need daddy to give them that loving reassurance as well, providing a loving protective atmosphere which allows them to flourish naturally. Not somebody who has abused them and lets them out of the house to all hours of the night. How many young girls with empty love tanks have turned to hormone-fuelled young men, seeking nurture, love and affection that has been denied by an emotionally absent father? The statistics for under age pregnancies can back this up.

The worst thing that any family can have in the home is an emotionally absent father.  Now this doesn’t mean that he is a bad father – he may supply the basics in life – like food, warmth, shelter, and clothing or lavish everyone in the family with materialism, but basic human loving contact, one on one bonding fatherly love and affection is absent. That’s what moulds us into adults. If that’s missing you could well be running around on an empty love tank yourself and addictions will be queuing up to fill it – especially pornography.

Guys, you have the opportunity to guide your kids away from where you are now. Pornography changes a heart of flesh into a heart of stone, tender feelings into sheets of steel and turns love into abuse. You will never realise this until the Holy Spirit reveals just how much you have changed. It’s been said that the most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother, by this he sets a healthy model for his children to see, the masculine presence, respecting and honouring the feminine presence in the family.

Jesus didn’t come to rule with an iron fist. He came to serve with humility and love, so this should be your starting point on re-birthing your marriage and family. You should no longer be spending hours with pornography or other leisurely pastime pursuits, so that means you will have plenty of time to invest in your forgotten family.  Investing means more than giving your family what they want or taking your kids to church once a week. It’s letting them know that you are also under authority, that you have made mistakes and that things can and will change for the better. It’s having family prayer time and godly discussion on what everyone watches and listens to, family accountability.  As you start to serve your family with a renewed love what you are doing is this, you are disciplining yourself, your wife and everyone around with Christ’s love and image. Click here for Be the Man payer

Gen3x –  Are you hooked on Porn?

“Hear, O Israel, Ye Approach This Day Unto Battle Against Your Enemies: Let Not Your Hearts Faint, Fear Not, And Do Not Tremble, Neither Be Ye Terrified Because Of Them. “Deuteronomy 20v3

 

 

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Generation XXX prayer

Lord Jesus, You know and fully understand the society and ungodly environment that I am forced to live in and the constant daily struggles that I face and through this all I try to remain pure. Your word tells me to be holy because You are holy, but I fall short of this every day in my life.

Lord, I also find it hard to be the Salt and Light that I’m called to be because of many temptations, Holy Spirit awaken my spirit to take every thought captive unto Christ and to flee from every ungodly situation that I find myself in, for it’s only by your power that I’m able to cooperate fully with You. Thank you Lord for calling me to be your witness to a lost generation, let them see You shining through my decisions and attitudes as I seek to glorify You with my sexuality and my body. Thank you Lord, Amen

Gen3x – Fighting Pornography Together

“Hear, O Israel, Ye Approach This Day Unto Battle Against Your Enemies: Let Not Your Hearts Faint, Fear Not, And Do Not Tremble, Neither Be Ye Terrified Because Of Them. “Deuteronomy 20v3

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Watching a Lost Culture Die

Generation XXX

 If you can get out of bed each day, switch on tv or radio, perhaps read a newspaper or magazine, travel to work each week without noticing the sexualised advertising, the provocative fashion that everybody is wearing, you either live and work in outer Mongolia as a goat herder or you have become so desensitised that you aren’t effected by your surroundings and environment any more.

– Caving into a sex crazed society –

Satan is described in Ephesians 2 2 as the Prince of the power of the air and because of this, we live in a conductive atmosphere which allows him to control the air waves which influences a lost and ungodly generation with sexual immorality through satellite, TV, films, porn-pop music channels, sleazy literature, provocative advertising, etc. Sexual pressure on teens and young adults is at an all-time high. Their friends and peers are giving into the pressures of a sex crazed society that mocks biblical holiness and sexual purity surrounded by an ungodly culture that accepts and even glorifies casual sex. Today’s teens and single adults are wrestling with sexual decisions that previous generations never had to face. God demands sexual purity, He knows the devastating consequences of sin.  STDs, underage/unwanted pregnancies, abortions, rise in mouth and throat cancer (HPV) in young adults due to oral sex, experimenting with same sex, ungodly soul ties and so on.

The youth of today, don’t have to take the same path as we once had; they don’t have to run the gauntlet of going into the news agents to purchase a dirty mag or asking at the local video store for the blue movie list. In fact they don’t have to leave their bedrooms as it’s all delivered and packaged to the way they want it every perversion available at the click of a button. You have to be 18 to get into a strip club to see a woman peel her clothes off but an 8 yr old can log in to some of the worst, obscene pornography for free where there are no ID checks, bouncers or police raids to put up with.

On top of this, the fashion that girls are now forced into wearing just feel acceptable. What guy can go out now and not be bombarded with navels, cleavages, low cut blouses, tight clothing or miniskirts.  Porn has also hit the high street fashion scene, clothes that years earlier would have been worn by prostitutes, now a generation of young girls have been seduced into cultivating an image that is sexual and sleazy. Jaded and rejected young girls have come to understand the more revealing their clothes, the more they will be noticed and to be honest, less respected. Unfortunately some girls will settle for bad love rather than no love.  If you are starving, bad bread is better than no bread, right?

In this environment we shouldn’t be surprised that promiscuity has risen in younger children, even in the church are women dressing to be attractive or dressing to attract?

Proverbs 27: 7 puts it like this: One who is full loathes honey, but to the one who is hungry everything bitter is sweet.

1 Peter 1v16 Be Holy, for I am Holy.  Is God setting us up here for failure? Think about this, the idea of living a holy life in such an unholy environment can seem like a cruel joke, but it isn’t totally unattainable, God doesn’t set standards that we can’t reach, He knows all about our daily struggles and what we are facing. He hasn’t suddenly gone quiet on this issue or turned His back on us.

 – Pornography the ideal teacher –

Just consider how far our own society has slipped right under our noses through the deception of sexual freedom: Take a moment here to reflect the seriousness of this next statement from Gail Dines and feel how the Holy Spirit impact’s you through it.

“Never before have we brought up a generation of young boys and girls on Hard Core Pornography.”

This is no joke guys. Secular Counsellors, therapists, psychologists are all sitting back in absolute fear because they have also recognised this problem; they know all about the progressive downward spiral of pornography and the destruction that is headed this way. In fact right now we are all living in the biggest social experiment ever and nobody has an answer on how to deal with this spreading epidemic.

Forget about the traditional porno films with the bad story lines and awful acting. This is Gonzo and Scat pornography were women are treated and humiliated worse than animals. This is the hardest, most extreme degrading hardcore pornography available today. This is total body punishing sex and this is the entry level. So if pornography spirals out of control what is the pit that awaits them?

Our young men’s sexuality has been hijacked. Will they understand God’s heart on this matter and what the bible has to say?  Will they be able to give and receive love, treat and view their wives and girlfriends with respect? Through porn they will learn how women should look, how women should act and behave and how women should perform to keep them happy.  Always willing, always available and that women always want sex and that sex has nothing to do with intimacy and relationships and every sexual encounter should end up with a money shot to the face,

It’s not good news for the girls who they are going to date or end up marrying. Because the men of tomorrow are being fed today on a diet of toxic porn, they will probably introduce them to ungodly sex?  They will probably insist that they defile or degrade themselves, be physically, verbally, emotionally and spiritually abused and perform graphic hard-core porn sex instead of the safe, loving, intimate sex that God created for marriage. Which Christian parents can sit back and let this happen and do nothing about it? With the high percentage of Christian men struggling with pornography today, chances are that our daughters could end up living this life in silence, fear or even worse, thinking that it’s totally normal.

– mummy porn –

The internet has become the ideal delivery system while Pornography has become the ideal teacher. That emphasises the absence of communication and openly exploits themes of humiliation promoting rape, child molestation, paedophilia  prostitution, domestic violence, verbal abuse, assault, sexual harassment, sexual violence, voyeurism, bestiality, group sex, oral sex, anal penetration, S&M, urinating, etc as the entire norm. Pornography doesn’t protect women from rape or humiliation, it reinforces the idea that it’s all harmless fun.

Today’s generation has really no history of sex to compare those images to and on top of that only 5% of all sexual encounters in pornography depict “normal” heterosexual intercourse. Pornography teaches guys what to expect in relationship, while on the flip side of pornography there is a booming multi-billion dollar romance industry that is targeting and educating women.

The romance industry (now dubbed mummy porn) is also leading women into an unrealistic, fantasy world bringing about an unrealistic expectation of men that teaches girls what they should be looking for in a relationship. Now younger girls seem to be in their sights with dark paranormal romance novels becoming the next big attraction.  Romance novels out sells all other categories of books almost 2-1. The Pornography industry and romance novels are two poles apart, there can never and will never be any middle ground or compromise, our enemy will make sure of that.

This is the message that the World and the Internet is teaching them right now. If we idly stand by and refuse to educate our kids and neglect to talk to them we, along with the media, society, church (it isn’t doing much to address the problem) pornography, lust, porn-pop culture, we may as well all conspire together to set up the next generation for failure, failure in God, failure in relationships, failure in marriage, failure in morality, failure in holiness, failure in purity, failure to respect the opposite sex. For encouragement on how to talk to your kids on this important topic check out Porn Talk.    For Generation XXX Prayer click here

Gen3x – Overcoming Pornography Addiction

“Hear, O Israel, Ye Approach This Day Unto Battle Against Your Enemies: Let Not Your Hearts Faint, Fear Not, And Do Not Tremble, Neither Be Ye Terrified Because Of Them. “Deuteronomy 20v3

 

 

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Porn Talk

Hey Kids let’s talk about Porn!

As a parent I have listened to so many other Christian parents panicking and worrying about how they are going to approach the topic of internet pornography with their kids. When the fact of the matter is that talking to your kids about pornography, masturbation, and sexual immorality shouldn’t be any harder than talking to them about the weather, school work, sport or whatever else arises and here’s why:

– not on my watch –

As parents, we are the ones charged with teaching our children, not the world, the media or even the internet. It’s our responsibility to counter-act the lies and ungodly influences and carry the fight back to the enemy through education and scripture. We are their first line of defence, not the church or an internet filter. If your child was drowning, you wouldn’t wait until Sunday to get the Sunday school teacher to come and rescue them for you. No!  You would jump into that river to pull out your drowning child even if you couldn’t swim.  You wouldn’t encourage them to walk into a burning building either.  So why are we happy to pass the buck and passively sit back and watch as their spirit drowns in a sea of filth and their soul burns in hell? The bible is very clear on how we should bring up our children. Proverbs has every situation on how to train up a child covered, including pornography (Proverbs 6-7).

Unfortunately, because of the society that we live in today, parents are either too busy, too tired, or not capable of teaching their kids right from wrong. The church has done a great job with Sunday schools and has stood in to fill the gap.  However, nowhere in the bible will you see the instruction to pack your kids off to Sunday school/youth fellowship to have them taught by people who aren’t much older than they are, with little or no experience of life.  Training begins at home.

– So where do we begin? –

If you have ever listened to Ken Ham from www.answersingenesis.org, you will know Genesis is the place to start. Here we have Adam & Eve who were in the garden, totally naked and they were not ashamed Gen 2:25. Shortly afterwards everything went pear shaped as sin entered and spoiled it for everyone. So many parents miss this point and jump straight in, feet first, with the “ Don’t be looking at that”,  “Don’t let me catch you watching that filth” with an attitude to match, thumping out a hard disciplined message, rather than explaining God’s ideal plan for sex between a married couple and the respect that comes with it. God created it, the world has abused it, and Christians are embarrassed by it.

The reason we adults struggle with this topic is that we probably struggle with the Lordship of Jesus in this area ourselves. But, hey, don’t be too worried about the responsibility that you have, there’s another source out there that will fill in the missing blanks, correct the myths that they have and give them an education second to none when it comes to sex! The internet. The world and society will win by default because it is always talking about sex and addressing the issue as it sees fit, basically unchecked and unchallenged. What voice has the church in this area?  Sex was created to be enjoyed through marriage, so we are the ambassadors.  We should be the voice of reason not the pornography industry. Unfortunately pornography has done a good job, in fact, a great job in repackaging/re-branding and promoting sex. Pornography now seems to be today’s measuring stick that says what you need to look like, be like, and behave like to be happy, satisfied and fulfilled.  Nearly everything that the world has to offer outside of marriage has become distorted and corrupt.

The first exposure to pornography is 8-10 years for boys and 10-12 for girls, the largest consumer of internet pornography is the 12-17 year olds. The adult industry says that children make up to 30% of all internet porn traffic, so the earlier you start the Porn Talk the better. Kids have nothing to learn about the internet, most of them are actually teaching their parents.  If it can be searched on-line they’ve probably been there already and are wearing the tee-shirt, you know the one with the bunny print that says” I got this free with my two hundredth download”. Its going to take more than crossing your fingers and wishful thinking to get your children through today’s sex-crazed society.

You are the parent, you will know when your child will be ready to hear this out, but remember, there should be a united front in the home from both parents explaining this talk, so they get to hear an even balance and hopefully feel free to speak to either parent at later dates.  Please use and share the following template to talk to your kids. Expand on this Porn Talk essay and make it as personal as you need to best suit your situation.

– Parents it’s your turn, here it goes! –

“What I’m about to speak about, I would like you to listen to very carefully.  I don’t want to see you make wrong mistakes, your best interests are my only concern. I hope this will save you so much trouble later. We are living in an ungodly environment where everything that God made good has been spoiled and defiled. God’s perfect gift of sex between husband and wife has been made cheap and dirty. Pornography, music videos, advertising, films and everything sexual seems to be the tactic that the enemy is using to lead people astray from God’s best.  Pornography is now everywhere and I’m sure it hasn’t escaped your attention. This is an industry that is fuelled on greed, broken lives, trafficking, wickedness and brutality against women. It’s an industry that thrives on never satisfying the customer and will lead you on a road to ruin. Pornography will appeal to you like nothing else, promising untold pleasures, those seeking to fulfil your every desire – but I need to warn you about the hidden danger that it covers over.

These people aren’t having fun, the sex they portray isn’t safe, and the lives they live aren’t cool. Sure, they look good, but money can buy any look you want. If the girls involved knew what true joy was, they wouldn’t be selling their bodies for it. I want nothing more for you than to live and enjoy a life that is free from all slavery, but the sad fact is that pornography is a trap – it’s a form of bondage, on a power equal to drugs.(see Satan’s bait for a more complete list) Pornography is created for one purpose and one purpose only and that is to implant into your mind ungodly imagines/scenarios thoughts of perverted sex that will encourage you to defile the marriage bed, your spouse and yourself in front of God. That, in fact you have secretly introduced Baal-Peor/Satan worship into the bedroom and turned a safe sanctuary into a demonic shrine.

There are so many men and women caught up in it’s trap and they have no idea who they are worshiping and can’t seem to break free.  Pornography plays with the mind so much that you’ll have no rest from it. Your mind will be tormented day and night, every woman that you meet will leave you with a distorted view, and every situation will lead your mind into an ungodly scenario because that’s how it works. It wants to own you, to control how you think and act, it takes the innocence that God created and completely destroys it. The thing that nobody tells you about pornography is when it gets in there, it drives you, controls you and prompts you to go further than you were prepared to go.

In effect, you have surrendered your free will to this monster. Think of pornography as a hunger that is never satisfied, once it rises up there is no rest until it’s fed and it doesn’t care about the hurt and ruin it leaves behind as it ransacks for more. Men and women in pornography are out to seduce you, want you to believe that all they want and need is you, but really all they want is a job to supply their next fix.  A lot of the girls in pornography are addicts – that’s what helps them to get through what they do. Porn, stripping, dancing, modelling is simply paying the bills.  Your money and passive support is keeping this industry fuelled and these girls in chains. So please think carefully about what I have told you and don’t allow yourself to be drawn into this trap”.

  1. Once you have the Talk, follow up and keep the conversation fresh with offers of encouragement and support.  Neverlet the fire go out on this topic.
  2. Reassure them that you are always there to talk anytime they want.
  3. Offer to be an accountability partner, make a date once a week, and give encouragement daily.
  4. Don’t be embarrassed to pray with them and get them to pray for you as well.
  5. Open up to your own struggles – let them know that you are real and this was an issue for you too.
  6. Internet Pornography is so aggressive that we can no longer trust anyone, anything, or any site.  We need to step up to the mark and do this for the next generation.
  7. Be a support partner to other nervous parents.
  8. Offer to help out single parents with kids of the opposite sex.

This is our watch, our time, our kids, our generation, we must leave this society a better place for the next generation. click here for Porn Talk prayer

 

Gen 3x – Fighting Pornography Addiction

“Hear, O Israel, Ye Approach This Day Unto Battle Against Your Enemies: Let Not Your Hearts Faint, Fear Not, And Do Not Tremble, Neither Be Ye Terrified Because Of Them. “Deuteronomy 20v3

 

 

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Satan’s Bait

 

– Satan’s bait –

Pornography has now become a Global Slave market for Satan, where the hearts and minds of people are chained to lust, perversion and immorality. This is HUGE.  It’s massive – every society and every age group right across the globe has been affected and infested by it’s toxic poison. Let the seriousness of this impact you right now as you consider how many lives could be changed and how many people could be set free if we surrendered our sexuality to the LORDSHIP of JESUS CHRIST. Pornography, adultery, fantasy, lust, rape, gang rape, fear of rape, fornication, bi-Sexuality, homosexuality, lesbianism, child-pornography, sex trafficking, molestation, call girls/escorts service’s, rent boys, pimps, prostitution, promiscuity,misogyny, masturbation, std’s, hiv, aids, swinging, dogging, group sex, perversions, pedophilia, incest, abortions, unwanted pregnancies, under age pregnancies, massage parlours, brothels, adult bookstores  red-light districts, peep shows ,erotic dancers, strippers/ strip clubs, divorce, defilement, cyber-sex, bestiality, voyeurism, bondage, S&M, transvestism, sexual abuse, sexual harassment- assault- torture-murder, sex tourism, sexual exploitation also the 100’s of paraphilias associated and not forgetting the Billions that could be saved each year.  All the suffering hurt and pain linked with this could be completely and permanently wiped out if we decided to put Jesus on the Throne.

Gen3x – Fighting Pornography Together

“Hear, O Israel, Ye Approach This Day Unto Battle Against Your Enemies: Let Not Your Hearts Faint, Fear Not, And Do Not Tremble, Neither Be Ye Terrified Because Of Them. “Deuteronomy 20v3